4 seasons

"Through streinght I found love, in time I found myself in happiness with you..."

During the short cold winter days she loves listening old childhood carols, dreaming the evening out of today's life, going back in the happy and careless past that used to make her smile so much. She can remember everything in detail, every look, smell, every father's word, every mother's whisper, every single day... She's missing that a lot. Trying with every small thing to bring those feelings back, sometimes she succeeds, sometimes it's all in vain, they are gone and keep being like that...gone. And all because of him, because he left early, too early so that a child can understand and deal with it normally. Surprisingly she dealed with it, quite well, but the scars are still in there, hitting so hard from time to time, bringing back al those moments...happy moments. She would be a lie not to appreciate al she's being given everyday, but is that enough, is that what she really needs?
Rains are cold and wet, uncomfortable and so impersonal, but they keep us going. Autumn comes around sometimes and that is when the feelings start growing stronger and stronger, senses come to life, like from a hibernation era; that is when she starts caring more. Everyone or anyone sees autumn as a depresive season, she doesn't, she knows she's coming to life, ready to face the cold with a full warm heart.
Summer days are on, the hot sunshines burn her skin everytime she goes out uncovered. She doesn't really like summer, except when swimming in the deep blue seas with all those tiny creatures. She believes she was a fish in a past life, so she can get lost in the waves for hours, thinking of nothing, numb, just with the embrace and sound of the cool water. During summer the shop is closed, feelings are completely asleep, nothing can disturb or awake them. Maybe short dreams or thunder memories pass by, but they are not that much minded, it's like the sun and summer trends erase all the life in there, leaving the body with only material and carnation pleasures, nothing spiritual.
Spring passes by so fast, she cannot even feel it. It's like a race car that never stops at the light. Senses are easily swept away, the chillness takes over, heart starts beating at normal speed, the memories fade away and all the muscles relax. It's time to rest, enough of feelings over the long cold winter. Body and soul are heading towards sun, towards the summer letargy, for a well deserved state of...high.

She...is me...